Trauma vs. Resiliency (Macro vs. Microaggressions, Pt 1 of 2)

Part I - Macro vs. Microaggressions

“I am a Social Worker. I am not a Social Justice Warrior.”

That statement may make some social workers squirm, and that is intended. The lot of us have become to distracted by lines of language to see the full environment. We can’t see the forest for the trees. Or in other words, we can’t pinpoint the aggression for the microaggression.

I believe that we have become too focused within our profession on the idea that microaggressions are overly responsible for the erosion of an individual’s self-esteem or sense of self-worth ( http://www.socialwork.career/2011/07/what-are-microaggressions.html ).

When this term was first introduced, it was used to describe interactions between people that purposefully (or otherwise) demeaned a “minority”, typically verbal exchanges. More recently, the term has taken on a more generic meaning and has been applied to everyday insults and superficial comments made from anyone in a majority group to outside of that group, about anything disparaging (https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/microaggressions-in-everyday-life/201011/microaggressions-more-just-race ).

These “everyday slights,” as they are often referred, are then stated to be the chisel that gradually chips away at our mental health, causing depression, anxiety and other issues.

As someone with a life-long disability I have endured many of these microaggressions. While my opinion of these is admittedly anecdotal, rather than empirical, my opinion still stands: they are overblown, overemphasized by psychologists, psychiatrists, and other medical professionals, and gobbled up by social workers as the bullets that penetrate the self-worth and determination of our disenfranchised populations. This medicalization and “clinicalization” of trauma tends to focus more on the potential damage done to a person, rather than their ability to overcome the trauma. Specifically, this approach to “science” is socially constructed based on societal values (http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/15622970500483110?journalCode=iwbp20 ).

At any rate, personally, these glib comments have barely held me back a moment, let alone a lifetime. Truth be told, they’ve done nothing but strengthen me. They’ve been the fire that’s burned within me to prove people wrong, to rise above.

Meanwhile, there are millions of people in this world that deal with legitimate toxic trauma every day. Sexual assault, physical assault, drug abuse and addiction, any and all manner of victimization and many others...these are the areas where time and energy and healing need to be focused.

The Aim of Blame (plus things we can all do to bring ourselves back from the brink)

Several people are running around this week shouting that we need more robust gun laws in the wake of the Las Vegas shooting that took place.

It is my firm belief that those that those people are wrong.

You have others who claim this is certainly a tragedy, however this tragedy does not warrant any policy change to address these types of acts.

They are also wrong.

Changes to gun laws would not have prevented the incident in Las Vegas. If you don’t believe me here’s an expert’s opinion, that was formed by academics, rather than anecdotal experience.

Additionally, there’s a video that has recently found renewed popularity online regarding the technology that was relevant when the 2nd amendment was written. If you haven’t seen it you can find it HERE. Attention-grabbing, satirical, and perhaps a bit humorous, is it not? All possibly true, but it is also ignorant. What this video ignores is perhaps the more relevant item based on its historical context: The fact that the authors of the 2nd amendment were living in a time when government overreach was not the plot of a far-fetched suspense novel, but reality.

The truth is there is not one right answer to the question of “How could’ve the Las Vegas tragedy (or any mass shooting) been prevented?” Moreover, the answer to “What could’ve stopped Stephen Paddock from killing over 50 people?” is even more elusive.

The things that stand out to this author are as follows:

1. Assess your Values
1. Figure out what it is that drives you, what’s truly important
2. Determine how you can factor in these values to your daily living
2. Streamline your commitments
1. There are a thousand things barking for our attention everyday. To be a modern person it is expected that you do things that, for lack of a better phrase; weren’t even a thing 10, 20, 30 years ago.
2. Quite simply, remove the things that are without purpose, or simply aren’t worthwhile.
3. Connectivity
1. Even the most cynical among us (raises hand) realizes a complete lack of interpersonal connections is a recipe for disaster
2. Connect with family, friends, acquaintances, even strangers!
4. Self care
1. Mental health is a lot like physical health, if you don’t do it for yourself, no one will do it for you.
2. Make it a point to engage in some activity you enjoy that reduces your stress level

Better Than What?

About a week ago I was at work. The night started out normal enough; some light cleaning, doing the dishes, folding laundry. Returning the same resident (we’ll call him ‘Larry’) to his bed in order that he go to sleep approximately 50 times in a span of 2 hours, because he has no short-term memory to speak of, limited cognitive focus, and has trouble sleeping due to the bevvy of psychotropic drugs he is prescribed. As you can see all very typical, mundane things.

Oh, perhaps I should mention I work in a group home for the developmentally disabled.  

It’s not a bad gig most of the time, in fact quite the opposite. I work third shift, I clean, do some meal prep or cooking, laundry and other household chores. The members I serve have issues ranging from cerebral palsy, to epilepsy, to complete visual impairment, among others. Of the 3 boys, who are all high school age, most have several of these disorders on top of one another, and all are non-verbal. These things withstanding they are a pleasure to be around. When they smile, it’s brighter than you or me could ever hope to match. When they laugh it’s without the weight of past disappointments, regret or disillusion. It’s really beautiful to experience first hand.

However, let’s get back to Larry for a second. It was a Friday night, during which he’s amped up because he knows his mother comes to pick him up on Saturday. He gets excited and has difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep.

This night, on the 50th trip back to his room I was walking him down the hall to tuck him in, I detected a wall of the foulest smelling odor I could imagine. Not a literal wall, mind you, purely figurative, let me tell you though the scent was very real; it was absolutely horrid.

(Warning, Warning!, WARNING: really disgusting material forthcoming)

I turned on the light in Larry’s room and discovered several piles of feces, one of which he had tried to hide unsuccessfully under his bed. I calmly and promptly sent Larry to wash his hands while I cleaned his room. After slapping on the most stylish pair of rubber gloves I could find, I went about the nasty work. First, I had to (Editor’s note: some material redacted due to graphic nature) #$%#$%#$%#$% #$%#$% #$%#$%, and of course it was squishy. Then, I needed to #$%#$%#$%#$% #$%#$%#$% #$%#$%#$%#$% making sure to take care of the big parts first. Finally, for the drops I #$%#$%#$% #$%#$% #$%#$%#$%.

Clearly, you can imagine how disgusting it must’ve been.

Now as revolting as that might seem, again I want to remind you what I said earlier still holds true: Getting to work with these kids, and seeing them experience what I imagine is the purest form of happiness in existence is the reward here.  

So I wrote (and re-lived all that) just to write this: Cleaning up shit is still better, and more rewarding than working at my last job...

...which was what you ask?

Bank of America.