Group Pilot, err I mean Facilitator

            My field instructor smiled at me, “You’re going to be running this afternoon’s group.” I immediately looked behind me to make sure there wasn’t someone more qualified, or someone else he had meant to address. There wasn’t.

            “Great, can’t wait,” I lied through clenched teeth. Already I could feel the sweat building from my armpits. How could this be I thought? Why in God’s name would they want me to run group? Who called off? Are they trying to redefine the word ‘desperate’?

            And then it dawned on me…I am training to be a social worker, one who will eventually be going on to work with those that have had mental health issues, experienced trauma or been trying to live a substance-free life. While this realization did give me some comfort, I still felt my heart begin thumping as if it were about to break through the outer wall of my chest.

            After doing my best not to float away in my own nervous perspiration, I quickly worked up the nerve to ask my field instructor what exactly that meant.

            “Relax, I’ll sit in with you and see how you do for a bit, and I’ve already put together the lesson plan.”

            My mind still protested. I can’t! I’m not ready! You’ve got the wrong guy! My mouth said, “Sure, I’m ready, I was wondering when I would get the opportunity.” Stupid! Why’d you say that? Now you have no other choice but to run away. That’s right, leave at lunch, don’t come back. Ever. That will do the trick!

            Luckily, I had a full two hours to review the material beforehand. Today we would be looking at commonly held irrational beliefs and typical thinking errors. Oh no, and I was already catastrophizing the event and it hadn’t even taken place yet! I beat back the thoughts as self-destructive and set to work making scribbled notes and highlights all over my worksheets for the full 120 minutes that followed.

            Before I knew it, there I sat, face-to-face with a room full of twenty men, not much different than myself- all of them staring at the front of the room waiting to get started.  

            “Well…” my field instructor hinted as he sat next to me, arms folded.

            “Oh me? I start?”

            He nodded.

            “Alright gentlemen…” I proceeded to lay down the ground rules that I planned to use in order keep the meeting on track. It was exhilarating! That was the catalyst that sent me into a deep state of focus. I put on my reading glasses just to make sure I was centered, and the fear and anxiety that had gripped me for the last two hours left me completely.

            My field instructor turned to leave the room after only a few minutes. Oh my! You’re on your own! I felt like I was flying a plane for the first time all by myself. Keep it steady, do not screw this up!

            I set the tone; they shared, elaborated on concepts and were respectful of one another. It was a magnificent experience for me.

            Of course, in this setting it’s not about me at all.

            Following the meeting I asked the guys to provide feedback to my instructors. They did. It was honest. It was constructive. I was also not surprised that some of these gents were not shy when it came to telling me personally how I did.

            To be honest, it wasn’t all great- but nor did I expect it to be. It was my first time facilitating a group such as this. Although, they did give mostly favorable feedback. My field instructor echoed their statements telling me that I had indeed done a great job.

            It was a rewarding feeling. To celebrate the first thing I did was to come home and continue to study up so I could do better next time.

I'm (Pro)Found

Hot damn have these last few years been infused with self-discovery and self-exploration.

I’d have put an explanation point after that statement, but to be honest, it wasn’t exciting- it was frightening. Was it worthwhile? Yes. Was it hard? Hell yes. Was it uncomfortable? Absolutely. Would I trade it for anything? Fuck no.

I learned I am in no position to gauge the worthiness of another man (or woman, or anyone else for that matter). You might read that statement and think “Well, ya YOU had to learn that but ME, nah I already know that.” Ya, sure YOU do pal. Good luck to you, see ya in the funny papers.

I learned that I have capacity to change for the better and I have the right to seek self-improvement. During that time I also learned those around me can do the same, no matter where they started from. It was a hard pill to swallow that someone else’s opinion could have relevance other than mine.

I learned that the truly intelligent never stop learning…from anyone, anywhere, at anytime.

I learned that no person is defined by one act within their lives, nor several. We are defined by what we do to make this world better than we found it.

I learned that I am not perfect, and really no one is…though I had that one put together a while back.

I learned that I am not the smartest person in the room… Well, to be honest, I’m still working on that one, and also changing the actual rooms I hang out in helps quite a bit.

When I started this journey, I thought that human existence was a highly overrated phenomenon. Now I have come to learn that empathy is what is really a truly UNDERrated phenomenon.

This is to everyone that I have crossed paths with in the last two and a half years that has made me pause and ask myself, “Could I do better?”

I am here to tell you: You can make it, you can do better, and to hell with all the people that think otherwise.

What's the deal with HB 2406?

1/26/2018

UPDATE 1/30/2018:Per the NASW's website has been updated to state that this issue will likely not move forward in the legislature! 

THANK YOU TO ALL THOSE WHO VOICED THEIR OPINIONS ON THIS MATTER!

For those of you of you that haven’t heard the Arizona House introduced HB 2406. This bill serves to deregulate many professions that fall under the oversight of the Board of Behavioral Health examiners. This bill would eliminate the need for professional licensure for the following practitioners: Social Workers, Counselors, Marriage & Family Therapists, and Substance Abuse Technicians, Licensed Associate Substance Counselors and Independent Substance Abuse Counselors (National Association of Social Workers, 2018).

Simply put, the proposal is ridiculous.

This bill potentially threatens the legitimacy of those in the above listed helping professions. Moreover, if passed, it would negatively impact client’s ability to receive behavioral health services and have them billed through their insurance companies (Arizona Counselors Association , 2018).

This bill’s nefarious purpose will only impact the mental health and well being of many of Arizona’s diverse populations. This proposal would ensure that veterans, those suffering from addiction, families and married people in need (and many others) would be on their own for mental health services previously supported by their insurance.

The fact that this bill was even conceived by legislators, let alone introduced, is a slap in the face to Arizona citizens from ALL backgrounds, cultures, and walks of life.

Odds are that 87% of us will visit a behavioral health professional, in the guise of a counselor, social worker or therapist at some point in our lives. Statistically speaking that means you are likely to have been helped, or receive the help of at least one of these professionals who deserve fully recognized credentials for their technical training. If this bill continues to move forward I urge anyone and everyone reading this to rally on the side of your friends, and loved ones.

Voice your opinion to your local Arizona state representative!*

Feel free to circulate this post or the included links in order to spread the word.

*There is a link within the NASW resource below that can help you to locate your AZ State representative, if you are unsure who that person is, or how to reach them.

*taken from azleg.gov

Resources and related links

Arizona Counselors Association . (2018, January 22). HB 2406 - Elimination of Licensing of AZ Counselors. Retrieved January 26, 2018, from AZCA: http://www.azca.org/aws/AZCA/pt/sd/news_article/150859/_PARENT/layout_details/false

National Association of Social Workers. (2018). Legislative Alert. Retrieved January 26, 2018, from NASW: http://cqrcengage.com/socialworkers-az/home?0

AZ Legislature Page for HB 2406 - https://apps.azleg.gov/BillStatus/BillOverview/70208?SessionId=119

My Brother's Keeper

Why is it most people these days are so unlikely to give one another a leg up?

I mean what are we afraid of?

Is it the possibility that in giving someone a helping hand we’re competing for limited resources and to help them gain expertise in turn helps them better compete for resources we too might want for ourselves?

Is it the aspect of taking the time to actually help that deters most people from assisting others?

Or is it just pure selfishness? To put it another way; we’re more into taking care of our own business than taking care of anyone else.

I just threw out a lot of questions, rapid-fire right there. And now that I’ve done that, I can answer: Truthfully, I have no idea why most humans can deny another the a simple act of helpfulness, let alone outright ignore the suffering of others.

Right about now you might be thinking; What’s got me on this tangent? (Yes, I know yet another question.)

That I can answer: I was reading an email from a fellow writer where she was discussing how she is constantly promoting and giving shout outs to people on social media, but seldom gets anything of the sort in return. (I’m sure some of you are thinking about social media and how fickle and self-serving people can be, I’m looking at you Twitter.)

At any rate, I figured it might be time I return the favor for someone that’s been supportive of my writing for many years, so here goes:

The fellow writer I mentioned earlier has been relentlessly promoting her books for a long time. The fierceness with which she believes in herself and supports others is only rivaled by her ability to see the positive in any experience. This shows in the passion she has for her writing. Emmy Morgan has penned tales of her main character; Desiré, and drawn from her own experience as a transwoman to create a timely and compelling story. And while I would be the first to admit what I know about a transwoman’s struggle in modern America wouldn’t be enough to fill Donald Trump’s gloves, Emmy’s energy gives both life and voice to her character in a way few could.

All that being said (or typed rather) as most of you know that read this blog regularly I do not “sell” anything here. My goal is simply to write and to have people read my work. It’s because of that stance that I won’t post direct sales links to Ms. Morgan’s titles, however in place of that I’d urge you check her out on Twitter and from there you can explore her fiction if you so chose:

@EmmyMorgan76

Oh and by the way, take a few minutes and help someone do something today. Not because you want to make yourself feel better, or because you expect anything in return, but because it’ll make the world a little better off.