Window Shopping: Kingdom Without a King- Part 7

The three of us trudged back the very same way we had entered this land hours before. In the midst of a remote snow field stood a window of miraculous qualities. An ordinary window it was not.

When we stepped in front of the window-like portal, Praesus, myself, and even Old Rufus the dog, noticed a problem. Namely, that the portal, instead of showing us view of the interior of Praesus’ chamber, from where we had traveled, showed only a fuzzy grey-black smudge. It reminded me of an old television set whose picture tube had just burnt out.

“Can we go through that?” I asked Praesus.

Carefully, he prodded it with his club as Rufus sniffed its edges. “Solid, it does not appear we can enter.”

“No you may not enter, for you still have dealings with us…”

The voice behind us sounded familiar, however, I couldn’t quite place it.

“Hands up this time please!”

“Oh, the lovely lady archer.” I raised my hands and turned. Praesus did the same, although he harbored his typical look of chiseled anger. Rufus simply patted before us, the look in his eyes seemed to indicate he knew how all of this was going to end.

“Your plague sorcery has decimated my home, and…” the young woman grew emotional, but caught herself just before tears, “and you’ve cursed my brother. You will come with me, or you will die where you stand.”

“Young madam,” Praesus said stepping forward, “on your authority alone we will be doin’ no such thing.”

The archer confidently whistled between her fingers, and a bevy of troops appeared against the cold breaking wind. They all showed gritted teeth and an array of readied weapons.

“That increases your authority substantially, I assume you’ll be escorting us back to the prison quarters?” I asked.

She motioned back the way we had come with bow drawn, “March, and be quiet as yer doing it.” Her reinforcements fell in behind her as we all headed back to the fort we had only escaped from minutes ago.

*

Back at the prison cell that I had broken out of earlier that day, the lady archer sat in front of Praesus and I on an old stool, only a set of time-weathered bars between us. The quarters smelled of shit and our own failure, the scents so entangled I couldn’t separate the two.

How could we let this woman follow us, and then subdue us?

I saw Old Rufus beyond the prison bars, chained just out of our reach

“I know what you’re askin’ yourself,” Praesus said, in spite of the woman listening to our every word.

“What?”

“How could we let this lone archer, and her band of merry idiots capture us?”

Surprised, I answered, “Actually, that’s exactly what I was thinking. Do tell…”

“We’re cursed young squire.”

“Eh, say again?”

“We’re cursed you and I, the two of us I mean, our working in tandem.”

“Right, and just how do you know this?” I spoke making sure Praesus would be well aware of my skepticism.

“No more talk.” the lady archer stood, as some noise came from the front of the prison. We heard a door open, the kind of sound you’d expect, ancient and medieval, hinged metal grinding against one another for the same space.

The lady archer shouted up the steps, “How is he? Is he ready?” her voice wavered with feeling.

Two guards came into view, they were escorting what looked to be another prisoner. With a closer look, I realized one of the guards was the man I had covered in Praesus’ elimination in order to prompt our earlier escape. They led, what I assumed was a man, down the corridor. Whoever he was, if it was in fact a he, was covered in a metal shroud that ended just below his neck. The contraption was something from Dumas' nightmares. This new prisoners hands were bound behind him, with a copious amount of chain.

They stopped in front of our cell, the now cleaned guard spoke to the lady archer, “He’s no better or no worse madam.”   

“Looks like we gettin’ a roomie squire.”

I didn’t fully realize what was happening until this new and mysterious prisoner turned towards me. The metal mask fastened to his head, had a narrow gap at eye level. Despite it’s small size, I could see a pair of those telltale green eyes glowing from within.

The lady archer nodded to the guards, one swung open our cell, the other unclasped the fastening mechanisms that held the mask on, letting it clang to the floor. Together they pushed the man into the cell Praesus and I shared. Without the mask, I recognized him instantly; Anton Allaine, the man who was commanding the opposing troops during our escape.

The lady archer’s resemblance to him was uncanny. As she leveled a finger at me, I saw the same sureness, same proud stance. In much the same way her brother had, she introduced herself, “You left my brother for dead and he ended up a ghoul. I, Asta Allaine would have you restore him or perish.”

Window Shopping: Kingdom Without a King- Part 4

I knew our alliance would be a temporary one, even as we had shook hands only mere minutes prior. Even still, I hoped I could trust him to help get us free of this place before that alliance dissolved. Praesus towered over me, looking even larger than he had the first time we had a fought. He would most certainly bludgeon me. The possibility existed I might be killed. As I contemplated this, I was not afraid. I would not be backing down.

That’s when Praesus charged. The man flew at me, teeth grimaced, a unfamiliar battle cry escaping them. I readied my fists, and prepared myself for the losing end of combat. Then something unexpected happened.

Footsteps echoed towards us from downstairs. Without looking I thought it to be the excrement-covered guard, finally recovered from his ordeal. But the truth was more incredible. Motionless, with an ash-gray tone about his skin, the portly guard peered up from the last step. His posture was slouched, his arms hung at his sides. However, all those things were overshadowed by the dull green glow that emanated from his eyes.

Praesus, in the midst of his charge, did not seem to notice when the guard shambled forward, effectively cutting Praesus off from reaching me.

When this happened I could see two things; one Praesus couldn’t fathom what he himself was seeing, and two; the back of the guard’s head was completely caved in. It was like an eggshell, dented heavily in the center, the trauma spidering outwards. Only the guard’s head was uneven flesh, littered with clumps of brain matter and sections of blood-soaked hair. And yet he was standing between me and Praesus.  

How was the guard standing exactly?

Praesus halted mid-stride to take in what was before him. His mouth fell open, and when this happened, he dropped the club. It clunked to the stone floor, echoing slightly in the chamber. Praesus was now unarmed and transfixed. It seemed he was caught by the eyes of the portly guard. They glowed like embers in a dying fire, the only difference was their shade of emerald green as opposed to deep orange.

“What sorcery is this?” he mumbled.

I began laughing uncontrollably, to the point where I could barely catch my breath. “Even given the seriousness of this situation, it's a shame no one else heard that. I mean could you have used a more cliché line?”

Praesus was most certainly distracted as he stared into the eyes of a man he had murdered moments ago. I knelt to pick up the club. As I did this the portly guard mimicked my actions exactly.

I looked at the guard, Praesus looked at me, and I back at him. We both held the expressions of shock. I waved the club back and forth, the guard’s right arm did the same.

“What the-” Praesus began.

“You were going to say ‘fuck’ right? Eh, probably not, more my kinda word than yours. I dunno, but this is definitely an interesting development.”

Then it dawned on me.

“You are going to help me.” Even as I began to speak, I could see the resistance in Praesus’ eyes. “Now listen, I have the only weapon between us, and I have…” I looked to the guard, “whatever this is.”

The confidence in his own size and strength left Praesus. It seemed he was not inclined to tangle with forces he did not understand. Fleetingly, I wondered the prudence of doing so myself. In spite of this, I was seized by a strange optimism,

“Crack open that door, make sure that’s Old Rufus they have in the courtyard.” Praesus didn’t need to know it, but even if it wasn’t Rufus yelping, whatever was going on out there we were about to put a stop to it, regardless. “Well?”

“They have him, chained to a pole in the courtyard. They appear to be throwing stones at him.”

“We’ve wasted so much time already,” I walked to Praesus and began to hand over the club. “Look, I am giving this back to you because I know those people out there are armed.”

Praesus reached for the club. I drew it from his reach.

“But, if you try anything- anything- I will make sure this guard gets his vengeance upon you.” Saying this statement had a sense of righteousness to it, I felt justified in threatening Praesus with it, though I had no idea why. To accentuate this the guard let out a moan, and extended his hands towards Praesus’ throat.

“Down boy.” I grinned. “Can we work together to escape from here and get Rufus back?”

Praesus nodded, I gave him the club. “What’s the strategy squire?”

“You go out there and clobber as many as you can with this blunt object. And me and,” I cocked my thumb at the guard whose eyes still held that eerie green glow. The guard also cocked the same thumb to nobody in particular, “this guy will...do stuff.”

If Praesus had any doubts (which he should’ve) he did not voice them.

I flung open the doors that led to the courtyard.

Window Shopping: Kingdom Without a King- Part 3

Live up to the handshake he did.
Praesus rose from his spot on the cell floor. As the guards charged him things seemed to slow until they played out at a quarter of their speed. Praesus dipped underneath the swing of the portly guard’s club. As the guard stumbled forward off balance Praesus effortlessly darted around him, faster than seemingly possible, and plucked the club from his grasp. Following that, Praesus swiftly cracked the blunt instrument against the back of the portly guard’s head. A hollow groan escaped the portly guard’s throat before he dropped to his knees and then collapsed, lifeless. Praesus looked at the club in his left hand, he whipped it back and forth through the air, evaluating its weight. Then he leveled it at his next target, the guard in the hall.

Through feces spattered eyes, the guard saw the larger man approaching. “No, I beg of you, just, just go. I’m no threat to you. I won’t raise alarm.”

Praesus advanced, raised the club at the kneeling guard’s face, but then stopped short of a full swing. “I s’pse you’ve been through enough. You certainly smell like it.”

Backtracking into the cell, Praesus attempted to rouse me. “Squire, we need to leave before others arrive.” He nudged me with his boot heel, shook me. When neither of those worked he reeled back and swatted me across the face.

“Sweet Jesus,” I snapped awake my eyes spinning as fast as my brain to figure out what was going on. “I could see you.”

Praesus curled his upper lip and ignored my comment, ”We need to go, unless you plan on shittin’ your way through more guardsmen.”

“But when I was out, I could see what you were doing!”

Praesus shot me the same look; half indifference, half confusion, and again repeated himself. “We need to leave squire.”

I snapped back to my senses, largely because I realized I sounded out of my mind, rather than the gravity of needing to escape imprisonment. “Alright, let’s find Rufus.”

Praesus nodded, leading the way up a narrow set of steps. Flanking the wood door, were two empty primitive torch holders. I noted that they appeared to be made of heavy metal, though even their rust was faded by time.

As we stepped through the threshold, I asked Praesus; “When they brought you in did you see any animal pens or the like?”

“Nah, you?”

“Well, I was unconscious, so no.”

“Aye, seems to be a favored pastime of yours.”

I didn’t answer. Rather (and not for the first time) I questioned Praesus’ dialect. They way he spoke hinted at education, but he applied whatever learned diction he had obtained lazily. It was a strange hybrid of a cockney and Irish accent. I wondered if either of those terms would be familiar to my former enemy and current ally. I wondered where he called home.  I decided now was not the time to ask. But the thought made me long for my own abode, if only for a second. I was alive and thriving in the chaos around me, operating at a different, and inexplicable level. The moment was consuming me in a way it never had previously.

Briskly, myself and Praesus made our way to the ground floor of the prison. Silently, he motioned for me to check the view outside. I nodded.

Carefully approaching the door, I pushed it open slightly, obtaining a narrow view of the courtyard. I saw a half dozen foot soldiers pacing back and forth. Each maintained a loosely choreographed route of patrol. They carried swords inside long sheaths, and their backs bore the burden of circular shields. I sealed the door and reported this to Praesus.

“What say you?” he asked.

“We need to find Old Rufus.”

“The dog, yes,” he muttered gruffly.

As if on cue I heard a dog yelping from beyond the door.

“Rufus!” I went to head out the door but Praesus cut off my path. “There are six heavily armed men out there that will likely kill you on sight. Need I remind you, that you are an escaped prisoner?”

Somehow, I found myself gritting my teeth defiantly in this giant’s face. “Need I remind you, if it wasn’t for that dog I wouldn’t be here? Thanks to your actions no less!”

“I know what I have done, and I know the reasons behind my deeds. I too know that you going out there will expose us both. I will not allow it.” Praesus raised the club he had taken from the guard. It was not a friendly gesture.

Window Shopping: Kingdom Without a King- Part 2

The growling echoed in my ears distantly. I thought of a dog, or the concept of a dog at least. Then I thought specifically of Old Rufus. The fear I held for him snapped open my eyes, only Rufus was nowhere near me.

To make matters worse I was in a fetid cell of some kind. I saw aged stone tiles, dirty from wear and stained with viscera. They were punctuated by rusted bars. Across a narrow hall, I could see another cell. By and large identical to mine, no windows, decorated in retro-medieval torture style, though it was empty.

To make matters even worse I looked next to me and saw Praesus’ face staring into my own.

“Funny thing, us meeting this way.”

Instantly, I recoiled my entire body, and hopped upright in the corner, in what I interpreted to be my best defensive stance.

“Relax squire, no point in killin’ you in here. We in the same boat.”

Without dropping my hands, I said, “Great to know.”

“For now, just for now,” Praesus winked at me.

“Do you mind telling me what that god-awful smell is?”

With more than a hint of aloofness Praesus blurted, “Had to eliminate my bowels.”

“Beg your pardon?”

“I had to shit,” casual as ever, Praesus enlightened me further by motioning to a small wooden bucket he had strategically placed in the corner.

“Great.” I said, accompanied by an eye roll. “Now I have to smell your ‘elimination’ until they kill us, or we starve to death.”

“Maybe, but bettin’ by day seven of no food whatever’s in that bucket might not smell so bad.”

I refused to think about that statement, or dignify it with a response.

“Currently though, we need to be figurin’ a way out of here,” he held out his hand.  

Looking around, I didn't have much to lose, so I shook it. Although I half expected him to shank me when I would’ve expected it the least he did nothing of the sort.

“Aye, what’s the plan?”

My mouth fell open, “What?”

“Well you seem like a right smart fellow.”

“I thought you might’ve been in this sort of predicament before...given your background.”

“Just how’s a man s’pposed to receive that remark?”

Praesus’ face mirrored the shock I had expressed only a moment ago.

“You’re kidding right? Ahem, in the remarkably short time I’ve known you, I’ve known you as a coercive,  kidnapping arsonist.”

Praesus nodded as vigorously as he grinned, “Right you are squire, but I need to tell you of a couple of things: one; those deeds I have actually done, and two I’ve never been interned for those, nor nothin’ else. These fools,” he motioned to what I imagined was the outside, “got me under lock and key for no cause. Only the thinkin’ that I might do something.”

“Shh, listen!” I said sharply.

Heavy footsteps echoed down the hall. The two of us watched as guards entered into view. One was portly, the other lean. They wore matching red outfits, emblazoned with gold accents. Cowls covered most of their faces, save for their mouths and chins. Both of them looked as though they may never have been washed.  

“Inspiration means action requires little forethought.” I said to Praesus before making a mad dash for the bucket.

I scooped up the container, and ceased inhaling. Aiming my throw between the bars didn’t prove too difficult. The excrement sailed through the air in a thick arc, coating the lean guard completely on one side. The remaining waste splattered with a disgusting noise against the floor. The coated guard’s response was perfectly reasonable; he fell to his knees and began hurling uncontrollably.

The portly guard however, was angry. He went for the keys at his belt. “You little mongrel! The portly guard twisted the key in the lock. He drew another item from his belt, this one a baton that terminated in a swelled end. “I’m going to make you lick that off Lawrence’s uni until it’s clean!” The portly guard swung the door open mightily.

I turned to Praesus, “Smart guy got the door open, your turn.” Immediately following my statement I was struck in the back of the head. I went down hoping Praesus would live up to our handshake.